Sunday, November 29, 2009

You don't know about me

Thought I'd send a little swooning sorrow and hypnotizing rage your way on this lovely Monday morning. Also, enjoy "It's Cold Outside." It's my cure-all for any shitty day.


"And I cry out of pain, fury and rage
And I cry
Driven by the crowd that rushes
And dances a mad dance.
I am swept away
And I clench my fists, cursing the crowd that stole
The man it gave me
And I never found."




"Take another drink of wine. Then maybe you'll change your mind."

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

You Will Suffer With Me/Cass, I Love You

Recently, I've been plagued by two earworms. You will suffer with me.





Lastly, here's some Mama Cass. Man, she was great. I misses you, Mama Cass.



One day I wanna sing this in a public place. Yeah, I can sing. I sang "The Rose" by Bette Midler for my mom's birthday at a coffee house thing. Yeah, I totally didn't get booed. It was awesome. Anyway, someone make this happen. Or the bunny gets it.

Saturday, November 21, 2009

"I'm in the car a lot"

http://vimeo.com/7748444

password: businesstime

It's no "Dayman," but it'll do.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

OK, just go with me on this one ...

Every day at my job, we receive faxes from all over the country, announcing forward-looking statements, the openings of new bank branches, and the financial goings-on of blah blah blah. But(!) every couple of weeks, we receive a nugget of awesome called the “Aish HaTorah’s ‘Fax of Life’: insights into life, personal growth and Torah” from Rabbi Kalman Packouz. No, I’m not a religious person, but that doesn’t stop me from loving Rabbi Packouz’s fax. (P.S. His picture is at the end, and he’s pulling a thumbs up and smiling. Automatic awesome. Edit: Oh, my god. I found his picture and here it is! I want to stick him in my pocket.)

The last fax was about living a “kinder” life and although most of it was common sense, sometimes people forget that you have to give kindness in order to receive it. A kinder lifestyle can lead to a happier, more satisfying life. ANYWAY. This morning's(!) was about the Jewish tradition of Shidduchim, or “matchmaking.”

When the time comes, a young person goes with his/her parents and they visit a matchmaker. The matchmaker gets to know the person’s personality, values, aspirations, you get it. Then the matchmaker scours the neighbor looking for a suitable match. Then when a match is found, a job interview of sorts is begun and a match’s “references” are triple-checked, even down to kindergarten. Then after a date or two, the two people high-five or part ways.

Rabbi Packouz acknowledges that all this may seem quaint, but the system, as a whole, works most of the time. He cites Rabbi Dr. Abraham J. Twersky’s work “Twersky on Chumash.” Here’s an excerpt:

“Western civilization is awash in love. The media bombards us with love via every possibly modality: verbal, graphic and lyrical. Is it not strange that with all the emphasis on love, the divorce is an alarming 40 percent? … What passes for ‘love’ in western civilization is either blind passion, or at best, self-love. Neither of these are a basis for an enduring relationship. Passion dissipates fairly soon and self-love may be rather easily frustrated.”

With all this in mind, VH1’s “Tough Love” will be back for a second season Nov. 18! Steve Ward, Philadelphia’s matchmaker, brings all these sad sack women together and, sometimes, helps then find love. Said sad sacks include “The Over-Texter,” “The Princess,” “The Biological Clockwatcher,” aaaand the ever-popular, ever-amusing “Whore with Daddy Issues” because she gets drunk too often, insults innocent dates, and has a blatant crush on Ward. Try to guess which one was which. Enjoy this taste of what you’ve been missing on the eve of the new season.

To be honest, party people, I've never been good at analysis and synthesis when faced with data and evidence. Ask my undergrad professors, they will totally agree. But with the infectious diseases known as eHarmony, Match.com, OKCupid, and Plentyoffish claiming nameless millions, it's no wonder I feel that single people the world over have screamed "Uncle!" and want help finding someone that won't take the last SnackPack without asking. Lugubrious bastards.

Thoughts? Rants? Indifferent shoulder shrugs?

OK, you've been good, here's a LOLcat:

Monday, November 16, 2009

"It's like one guy doin' another a guy a solid ..."

Here's the fascinator in progress, in pieces, pre-feathers:
And here's a picture of the finished (for now) product:

It's really rigid right now and I'll need to trim the feathers a lot shorter. I may also add a small flower to hide any imperfections. haha. So there it is. Womp woooomp. So I'm not impressed by my final product, big whoop, wannafightaboutit?

Next up:
She will be mine. Oh, yes. She will be mine. In a different color.

Did you guys hear about the Florida teacher that was fired because he compared the shape of Florida to a PENIS? Yeah, he was fired. He's gonzo. Here's how I'm handling it. I'm laughing, that's how I'm handling it.

Dance, monkeys, dance!

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Pectus Dentata

I put a new video on Vimeo, but it's not interesting at all. I would only watch it to hear the song I put over it. The password is sandwichparty. I think a good part of the fun of uploading videos is getting to pick out a password. Most of the videos are just to see what I can do with Windows Movie Maker. Kinda like saying "seeing what I can do with MS Paint." Or like trying to play "Fur Elise" on a hair comb covered in wax paper. Speakin' of workin' with m' hands:

Wish me luck. I want to make a small, simple fascinator to wear to ... events? The pictures I find of other examples are really ridiculous and sassy and I just want a subtle one.

I was flipping through my DVD stack and decided to look through "The Manchurian Candidate." There are two reasons why I love the original "The Manchurian Candidate":

1. There was one person dedicated solely to Janet Leigh's HAIR:

2. Frank Sinatra's glasses:
Also, doesn't Laurence Harvey look like Jude Law in that movie? Sometimes? A little bit?

Friday, November 13, 2009

I miss Janet Jackson's shoulder pads

The only nasty thing I like is a nasty groove, huh
***
Nasty Nasty boys, let me see your nasty body move, huh
***
No my first name ain't baby
It's Janet
Miss Jackson if you're Nasty



We are part of the Rhythm Nation
***
It's time to give a damn


And finally, on this Friday: "If"